One of the biggest blocks to style is the fear of being too stylish, too beautiful, too seen.
A lot of us just want to be pretty “enough”. Enough to be thought well of, enough to fit in, enough to feel confident in our skins. And there’s nothing wrong with that, especially in certain situations. A wrist dripping with bangles is going to get in the way when you’re working in the yard, and you probably don’t want to wear a feathered fascinator to court.
We have, as a culture, developed a timidity about stepping out in public view. Being observed is only for the beautiful people… and we’re not one of them, of course. Couldn’t ever be.
We’ve developed the odd idea that dressing to the nines is something you only do when you’re on the lookout for a mate – and that has tragic consequences for many a closet. How many women do you know, when they’re asked to dress up, immediately pull out the cleavage?
If they don’t pull out cleavage, then they pull out the rhinestones (or equivalent). And the clothing they do pull out tends to be in poor repair and/or fit. They’re not comfortable in their skins – at least not when they’re at their best.
This is why our fashion victim never quite looks like she has herself pulled together – she’s sending the wrong signals.
It takes a bit of practice to work out your best looks, which is why you should dress to the nines occasionally without occasion. First, you need to learn to move in your nicer clothing. Second, you need to know what bits you’re missing – or what bits get snagged on everything. Third, you need to be emotionally comfortable in your good things.
And fourth… do you have good things? I mean, good things that suit the occasions that you have in your life. If you’re past the age when you go clubbing, maybe you don’t need a spandex dress. Maybe you need a beautiful blouse to wear to parties a few times a year over your serviceable work-slacks. Maybe you might consider upgrading your work-slacks, just a pair or two of them. It would be nice to be able to dress a bit better to that important meeting, wouldn’t it?
If you took a bit of thought about the occasions of your life, you might be able to figure out where to add nicer things, and slowly build yourself up. And if you thought of the occasions of your life, you’d be likely to wear the good things you’d bought, not just store them in your closet. They’d work with you, work for you – you wouldn’t have the honor of storing them for a ‘the perfect moment’.
Dressing to the nines, being one of the beautiful people, it doesn’t happen over night. It’s one pair of good wool slacks, one beautifully draped silk blouse, one great gold chain at a time.
Take the plunge, and get a start with being just that little bit more beautiful… today!